(Image from google:.....)
Sitting here in my dark room….
I enjoy my moment alone in the dark, where the world around me is shut outside, when I can finally see myself and my struggles. It’s the place of my comfort, a place where I get down on my knees and pour out my heart without any restriction or fear, a place where I bottle my tears and pains. I’ve been thinking about life for a while now and about some stuffs that are going on around me lately.
I often think that life is a combinations of codes, coded by a Mastermind programmer, while we are busy figuring one aspect out of the code, the others are staring into our eyes telling us to come over for a little game of prank.
Life is beautiful when beheld from the vintage point of a child or in a childish-manner.
I love kids, no doubt about that. Sometimes, I wish I could just turn the hands of time and return to that time when I was a kid; running around with my pants, rolling some wheels around the neighborhood without caring if shade or Bukky saw me or not. As kids, we love the sincerity attached to been simple and innocent, not minding if the world runs clockwise or anti-clockwise. All we ever care for was nothing but a little bit of our comfort with some cookies to run around with.
Life was beautiful then, unlike today that I’m a grown up man, most of the things I do this day come out of my logical reasonings, while weighing my options in order to ascertain that things will go as planned.
Life was all good while we were wallowing in our innocence as a child but becomes terribly ‘bad’ as we begin to see the reality of not living innocently. Everything around seems not to make sense and we start chasing mist in the dawn of the morning.
It all becomes a rabbit chasing it shadow in the tunnel that is full of darkness. Though, thought, its making progress, but later found out that it always back to that point it started from.
Life as I know it today has been shaped by what my parents, neighbors, street, town, state and nation has exposed me to. While I agree that I’m part of the bricklayers adding my own layers to the building, but in reality, the foundation was actually laid for me long time ago.
My first parent, Adam and Eve had a foundation laid by God for them right there in the garden, before they were even created, all that was needed for life on planet earth was given by the hands of God. Man was simply created to enjoy the goodness of God and pass it on to the next generation that follow. The circle will then continue to repeat itself.
But, a cunning and crafty being came in to spoil all that was properly laid for Man. While the foundation of Adam remained intact, the children that followed lost theirs and inherited the foundation of another being which is totally different from what was laid for Mankind.
I’ve been given a foundation that’s not found in the Creator. I inherited this from the labour and error committed by my first parent. It didn’t stop there, my lineage also passed down what they’ve built on that wrong foundation to me, and here I am in this messy state of trying to dig deep and discover the foundation that was actually laid for me by my Creator.
It has really been a battle and a struggle. (Sigh)
Life as I know it today is totally different, though I’m trying my best to make sense out of all messy waters that is neither good for drinking nor for bathing, but I do know that there’s goodness attached to being alive this day and this is what I’m in a journey to discover.
There are thousands, if not millions, of people also figuring this out on daily basis. I will be so glad and thank the Providence if in His goodness He allows me to have an encounter with such beings before I finally meet Him at the end of my tunnel.
I’m learning a lesson of giving up the pressure that’s becoming a heavy-burden on my heart.
The world is throwing its stuffs.
“Churchianity” isn’t left behind in all this.
But, all I ever desire is to just BE. To be who I was made to BE and no one else.
I’m so grateful for this period of figuring all out. I do know that at the end of it all, life will show its reality and I will embrace that which is True and Pure forever.